


Everything Will Not Be Okay

by Petra4President



Series: Corpsekkuno <3 [9]
Category: youtube - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Funerals, Heavy Angst, M/M, Remix, Self Harm, Suicide, Unhappy Ending
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-11
Updated: 2021-01-11
Packaged: 2021-03-15 08:28:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28685598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Petra4President/pseuds/Petra4President
Summary: Sykkuno had been so sure his life was changing for the better when he was finally given the chance to talk to his soulmate. And he had truly been happy; like the last piece of the puzzle was fitted into place for him. Yet, a wrecking ball was taken to that puzzle, shattering it into thousands of pieces that he would never be able to put back together.This is a remix of my first Corpsekkuno fanfiction ‘Everything Will Be Okay.’ You do not need to read it to understand this one however, there may be some confusing parts. PLEASE READ THE TAGS BEFORE READING, THIS IS NOT A HAPPY ENDING.
Relationships: Corpse Husband & Sykkuno (Video Blogging RPF), Corpse Husband/Sykkuno (Video Blogging RPF)
Series: Corpsekkuno <3 [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2015482
Comments: 12
Kudos: 71
Collections: Server Simps





	Everything Will Not Be Okay

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Everything Will Be Okay](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27413992) by [Petra4President](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Petra4President/pseuds/Petra4President). 



> Hello all! I would just like to say that this remix was a challenge and my first attempt at an unhappy ending. And I really went for the unhappy part. This was painful to write but I am proud of how it's turning out so far. The chapters will all be based on one stage of grief. Naturally, denial is the first stage. This story is a remix of Everything Will Be Okay (by me) and follows the basis of Corpse succeeding in his suicide attempt rather than being found by Mykie. 
> 
> Bubble, I really hope this lives up to your expectations lmao
> 
> Thank you to Mollyrolls for being by beta as always as well as the two ideas that made this chapter even sadder <3

If someone were to ask Corpse what it was like living with crippling depression, he’d have one simple answer: there was a reason _crippling_ was in the name. 

He couldn’t remember a time where it wasn’t a struggle to get out of bed in the morning. He wanted nothing more than to just not waste his day staring at the ceiling, counting the number of times the fan above him revolved. He wanted to not cry himself to sleep, to not stare at the scars on his wrists practically _begging_ him for twins... just so he could feel something. And more than anything else, he wanted his mind to allow himself to be loved by his soulmate. To just take a sharpie and etch out everything he’s ever wanted to say to Sykkuno. 

But he couldn’t. 

Corpse couldn’t possibly do that to his soulmate. Plenty of people in the past have gotten fucked over by the people they were ‘destined’ to be with, Sykkuno wouldn’t be the first and he most certainly wouldn’t be the last. Corpse was doing him a favor; his soulmate needed someone who could provide for him. Not a man who can’t even take care of himself. 

Corpse was leaning against the bathtub, his apartment was eerily quiet. His eyes drifted to the spot on the bathroom floor in front of him where his prescription bottle of morphine sat. The muscles in his arms protested when he leaned forward to open the bottle, staring at the white circular pills. Picking up the bottle, Corpse closed his eyes as he felt the tears roll down his cheeks. There was no turning back now. 

The sound of running water filled the silence within his apartment, Corpse struggling to stand but he fought through the pain. Slowly, and carefully as to not spill the contents of the bottle, he descended into the bathtub. The water made his clothes stick to him uncomfortably but he ignored it. It's not like it mattered now anyway. The pills rattled in the plastic bottle as he brought it closer. 

“Sykkuno...Mykie. Thank you for trying to save me.” He whispered, before throwing his head back and swallowing each and every pill in that bottle.as his body began to shake. He could feel his throat constricting, his eyes going hazy as sleep was finally coming to consume him. He lost track of how long he was sitting in that bathtub, the sound of his phone pinging to tell him he had a discord notification. And then, his eyes trailed down to the arm that rested on the rim of the tub. A new message was forming, the black ink a stark contrast to his pale skin. He couldn’t make out the words, but he’d recognized that handwriting anywhere. Reality began to set in. And it was a crushing weight against his chest. 

He wanted to meet Sykkuno, to stay up late at night watching movies and playing games. He wanted to take him out on extravagant dates to show how much he loved him. He wanted to marry Sykkuno, to spend the rest of their lives together. 

He didn’t want to die

His heart started pounding, gasping breaths ripping through his throat as the tears broke through his haze. Corpse tried to pull himself out of the bathtub but his arms were heavy, the water splashing onto the tile beneath. His cell phone was only 20 steps away, _20 measly steps_ , but his body would no longer work. His breaths were unevening, his lungs filling with not nearly enough oxygen as he needed. And as time progressed, it became harder and harder for him to stay awake. 

He wasn’t _ready_ to die. 

Corpse sobbed, resting his head against the rim. He let out all his tears, trying to call out for help but no sound came out. He fucked up. He royally fucked up and there was nothing he could do about it. Corpse had let his thoughts get the best of him, he let his emotions control his actions without considering the repercussions. And now, he had just thrown away his chance at a life with his soulmate. 

His eyes fluttered shut, tears rolling down his cheeks as the picture of Sykkuno flashed through his mind. There were so many things he hadn’t said to him yet, things that he’ll _never_ get to tell him because of his stupid fucking choice. And as he laid in the bathtub, water licking at his neck and pouring over the side of the porcelain, he muttered his soulmate’s name before calm took over his mind, losing himself in the suffocating grasp of nothingness. 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Bye! I’ll see you guys next stream!” Sykkuno smiled at the camera, ending the video with a relieved sigh. He loved his job and his fans more than anything but they got pretty...intense sometimes. And today was one of those times. 

Pushing back from the desk, he stood up with a groan and stretched his arm above his head. His shoulder popped in a manner that was satisfying, and he began the process of straightening his room. He had been putting off for a while now, opting to write his soulmate instead. Not that he couldn’t do both at the same time, he just found himself anxiously waiting for writing to appear on his skin whilst getting absolutely nothing done. It was a conundrum. 

Sykkuno slumped into the bed, the gritting sound of the vacuum echoing in his ear. It only took him an hour to make the place tidy and the only thing left was the basket of clean laundry by the closet door. He sighed, bringing a hand up to rub his eyes but the jarring black of ink on his otherwise ivory skin caught his attention. He shot up and smiled once he saw that all-too familiar scrawl of Corpse.

**‘I’m glad to have gotten to know you, you’re such a kind person. And I am genuinely sorry you got put with someone who has so many issues. Thank you for everything Sykkuno, it means the world to me’**

The brunette had learned fairly quickly that Corpse thought lowly of himself. And it was something he expected since high school when the marks first appeared on his wrist. But Sykkuno made sure to send him compliments every chance he got in a pitiful attempt to make his soulmate realize his worth. He doubted it was working but he’d continue to do it. 

**‘I’m glad to have gotten to know you too! You give me a reason to smile after all <3’ **The brunette set aside the bed, blushing at what he just wrote. When it came to communicating this way, it was always easier for him to be more confident. Well, that confidence went right out the window when he would get a reply to whatever dumb thing he may have said. 

But after an hour of staring at his arm, he eventually decided it was time to get dinner. Sykkuno had forgotten to eat today and he didn’t doubt that his friends already had a four course meal laid out for him. He giggled at the thought, throwing his door open and descending the stairs. Many of them were still on stream and there were only three bodies in the living room. Sean was sitting on the armchair clicking away at his phone with furrowed eyebrows, Felix was perched next to him, whispering words that he couldn’t hear from the bottom of the stairs. 

“Hey Syk! I made some nachos!” Lily greeted from the adjoining kitchen, setting a plate of deliciousness on the table for him. His mouth watered at the sight of it, thanking Lily with a hug before digging in. It tasted just as heavenly as it looked. 

Slowly but surely, the rest of the household filtered in to enjoy the meal together. Lots of jokes were made about the recent Among Us games they played together and at some point, Felix and Charlie got into a nacho eating contest. Sykkuno found himself smiling throughout the night and after one final glance at his arm, sleep came to him easy that night. 

  
  


Two days. It had been two days since he last heard from Corpse. Usually, that wouldn’t bother him as he’s gone five years without a sign that he still existed. But they have been talking a lot more recently and at most, he wouldn’t get a reply for a couple of hours. Sykkuno knew there was probably a reasonable explanation to his silence; he was probably busy with new music. Yeah, that was it.

The anxiety never left him as he went about his day. He could barely stomach to eat, afraid that it would come right back up with each wave of nervousness. His friends had asked him what was wrong but he only gave them forced smiles, affirming that he was okay. They didn’t believe him but decided not to push it. They, instead, chose to distract him with video games and movies. And for a while, it worked. 

Sykkuno found himself playing Super Smash Bros, getting out first nearly every round but that was to be expected. He was never good at the game no matter how long Toast spent trying to teach him. Giggling, he grabbed the mug of hot chocolate and took a generous swig. There was a knock at the door and since he was the only one out, he set his cup down and opened the front door. 

The girl on the other side had short blonde hair, her body engulfed in an oversized hoodie and black leggings. Her eyes were a bright blue and slightly puffy around the edges. Sykkuno recognized her as Mykie from Glam&Gore. She offered him a shy smile, picking at the nail polish on her finger tips. 

“Hi, Sykkuno right?” Her voice cracked but she didn’t break eye contact. 

“Y-Yeah that’s me!” Sykkuno chuckled nervously, rubbing the nape of his neck. He wasn’t quite sure what to do and in the back of his mind, he wondered how she even got his address. 

“Um, sorry this is probably weird for you,” She ran a tentative hand through her hair. “I’m friends with Corpse.” Sykkuno perked up at that, his fingers brushing against the last mark on his arm. Mykie’s gaze flicked down to it and she bit her lip. 

“Oh! I’ve been worried about him! I haven’t heard from Corpse in two days, is he okay? I’ve been stopping myself from writing something to him every hour and-” Sykkuno stopped himself when her hand came up to stifle her sob. Tears roamed freely down her cheeks and a sinking feeling began to crawl its way into his chest. 

“I-Corpse...He-” Mykie choked, wiping at her eyes before meeting his gaze once more. “He left us.” 

“W-What do you mean?” Sykkuno croaked, holding his arms close to his body. He didn’t like the way she was looking at him. 

“He passed away, Sykkuno.” She whispered, reaching a hand out to touch him but refracting it last minute. The brunette swallowed the lump forming in his throat. 

“H-How?” He dared himself to ask, though he wasn’t sure if he was ready for the answer. 

Mykie sighed, “He killed himself.” 

And hearing those words triggered a visceral response. Just like that, the rose-tinted glasses he wore shattered. 

No one said anything for the longest time, Sykkuno unable to stop his hands from shaking. His throat felt uncomfortably tight and he struggled to bring in enough air. He had to grasp the door frame to keep himself upright as the weight of the situation began to set in. 

Corpse was gone. 

He would never meet Corpse. 

_He would never get to do all the things he wanted to with his soulmate._

“No…” Sykkuno whispered, earning a confused glance from Mykie. But her eyes softened, reaching out to place a comforting hand on his shoulder. He jerked back.

“No! He’s not dead! He can’t be dead!” The TV behind him had since been turned off and the words of his friends fell on deaf ears. He pushed his way past them, ignoring their calls as he barged into his room. He pulled out the drawers of his desk, throwing the contents around as he looked for a sharpie, marker, _anything._ Through blurry eyes, he found a black pen and ripped the lid off. 

**‘Corpse? Is this some kind of cruel joke?’** He wiped away the tears that fell on his forearm, waiting for any sign that Corpse was fine. That Corpse was alive and well. But none came. 

**‘Please, Corpse. Answer me!’** His writing was shaky and he found it harder and harder to hold the pen. A violent sob wracked his body, forcing him to the ground as he wrote one last shaky message. He felt the tip of the ballpoint pen dig into his skin, blood dripping down his arm and off his finger tips. 

It stained the carpet below but he couldn’t find it in himself to care. 

Why doesn’t he have new scars? If Corpse killed himself, why weren’t there long, jarring cuts along either of his wrists? Corpse can’t be dead, it wasn’t possible. 

Corpse _couldn’t_ kill himself. 

Sykkuno screamed into the plush fabric of the floor, ignoring the way his new message felt like fire was burning into his skin. 

Vaguely, he registered someone talking to him before a washcloth was being pressed to his forearm and he tried to push them away with what little strength he had. But their grip was firm and soon enough, a different pair of arms were around his torso. 

Corpse couldn’t abandon him like this. 

He didn’t know if it was from the blood loss or the wave of exhaustion that overcame him, but he found himself dreaming of the life he could’ve had with Corpse. The one he had always wished was his to live. The life that was ripped out right from under his feet without a sign or a warning. 

When he awoke, it was in a blinding white room. The sounds of beeping machines invaded his eardrums. A red-stained bandage was wrapped tightly around his arm, taunting him, sneering at him for his momentary weakness. He undid it with shaky hands, choking on a sob at the letters forever etched into his skin. 

**‘You can’t leave me, Corpse.’**

**Author's Note:**

> Please don't hurt me :')


End file.
